Dad Things
by miano53
Summary: When Xion and Roxas go about their daily chores, they see some unusual things that they call "Dad" things...


_Well, I got this story idea from one of the hashtags from Jimmy Fallon's segment of Twitter Hash Tags. So, own nothing, maybe except certain characters getting hurt _

_-miano53_

"Dad" Things

_In the Castle That Never Was, living room…_

Xion and Roxas stared at what they thought was an odd sight. Xemnas was working on his laptop and was sitting in a recliner. He was watching the sports network and had a cup of gin and tonic on the coffee table next to him. Instead of clapping his hands when something good happened for his favorite rugby team, Xemnas would applaud with his…feet.

"Er, what is he doing?" Xion whispered to Roxas.

"IDK…But this is so goin' on Twiiter," Roxas whispered back, texting on his cellphone.

"Xion…Roxas, aren't you supposed to be doing chores?" Xemnas asked, not looking up from his computer.

The two headed over to him and saw what their Superior was working on. He was sending an e-mail to a man by the name of Tetsuya Nomura. Instead of having the body of the letter in the body, he made the mistake of having it in the subject line of the letter. "Sir, what are you doing?" Roxas asked.

"I'm saving kilobytes," Xemnas said.

"Um, sir. That's kinda stupid. You have the entire body of the letter in the subject. So unprofessional," Xion said.

She then fixed the letter and had it in the correct style. The subject was only a few words long and the body was where it was supposed to be. After Xion was done, she said, "Superior, that was such a 'dad' move."

"'Dad move'?" Xemnas asked.

"You did something that only dads would do. That and clapping with your feet whenever your team scores in rugby," Roxas added.

Xemnas glared at them and it looked too…fatherly. "See? See? You look just like a dad," Xion said, pointing at him.

Xemnas gave them a death glare and the two said, "Okay. We'll go do the chores…"

The two then ran away, leaving Xemnas to his own devices. Noticing that he was indeed clapping with his feet Xemnas muttered, "I couldn't be doing 'Father-like' moves, could I?"

A thought came to his mind that said, "Yes you are."

Xemnas muttered several curses and continued to watch TV…

* * *

><p><em>In the Natatorium That Never Was (a.k.a. Demyx's pool room)…<em>

Xion and Roxas saw Axel and Demyx staring at a hole in the pool. Due to Vexen freezing the water at the bottom earlier, no water was lost. "So…What are we staring at?" Xion asked.

"We're trying to find out how to fix that hole at the bottom," Demyx said, still staring.

"I got an idea," someone said.

The four saw Xigbar fall from the ceiling. He landed on his feet and looked at the hole in the pool. "Oh, I can fix it," Xigbar said, holding a backpack full of rocks and a beer.

"Not again…" Axel said, remembering the last time Xigbar was drunk and tried to fix something.

"Gimme that garden hose, Tiger," Xigbar said to Roxas.

Roxas, out of confusion, did and said, "What are you doing?"

Xigbar gave Xion his beer and put on the backpack full of rocks. "Xion, give me that beer. Let me finish it," Xigbar said.

She did and he quickly drunk the rest of the contents. Xigbar then grabbed the water hose and said, "'Kay, I'm going in!"

Xemnas, who had seen what was going on via his computer, appeared through a dark corridor and said, "What the…? Number Two, what are you doing?"

"That's what we're wondering," Axel said.

"Here I go," Xigbar said.

"He's drunk again…" Roxas muttered.

"Wait, how are you gonna get on the bottom of the pool?" Xion asked.

"That's what the backpack of rocks is for," Xigbar replied.

"Then how are you gonna breathe?" Xion asked again.

"That's what the garden hose is for," Xigbar replied.

'How many beers did he have?' Xemnas thought, right eye twitching.

"Oh no!" Xion yelled.

"I'm going down. It's only seven feet. Here we go. Bye," Xigbar said, hopping in the pool.

"Oh my god!" Demyx, Axel and Roxas yelled.

"If he dies…" Xion said.

"There's something very wrong with him…" Xemnas said aloud.

The five quickly saw that he was drowning and Xemnas ordered three Dusks to pull Xigbar out of the water. They did and Axel and Demyx attempted to stifle their laughter.

Seeing that he was soaked from head to toe Roxas said, "That was such a 'Dad' move."

"A what?" Xigbar asked.

"A 'Dad' move. Something that only dads do. Xem…I mean, the Superior, did two earlier today," Xion said, stifling laughter.

"Oh…What did ya do?" Xigbar asked Xemnas.

Xemnas was about to say something when Roxas said, "He clapped with his feet when his rugby team was winning and he put an entire email in the subject line."

Xemnas glared at the poor Nobody and Roxas backed away. "Wow, that is such a dad move," Axel said.

Xemnas glared at everyone and each disappeared in corridors of darkness. When they were gone, he said to himself, "I don't act that much like a father, do I?"

Another thought came to his head and it said, "Yes you do."

Xemnas thought, 'Shutty.' He then disappeared in a dark corridor, heading for the living room.

* * *

><p><em>In the Library That Never Was….<em>

Roxas and Xion, who were in there to clean, saw Saïx staring intently at a computer screen. He then rapidly typed on the keyboard and the two saw that he was playing Angry Birds.

"Oh no," Xion said.

Saïx heard them behind him and he said, "What are you doing?"

"Um, we're just trying to clean," Roxas said, innocently.

"Then go somewh…Oh, Jesus Christ!" Saïx yelled, turning into his berserker mode. The reason for that was that he lost a round in Angry Birds.

"Uh oh," Xion muttered backing away.

"So…You lost?" Roxas said.

"Yeah, ya 'jackleg'!" Saïx yelled, growling.

"'Jackleg'?" Xion asked.

"I think he meant…y'know," Roxas said.

"Oh…Is he that mad?" Xion said.

"What are you starin' at, ya jackleg?" Saïx yelled, now snarling.

"Shall we run for our lives?" Roxas asked Xion.

"Oh yes, let's," Xion said calmly. Saïx immediately brandish his claymore and began beating the computer he was on to pieces. He then turned to Roxas and Xion and chased the two out of the library.

"Okay, that is such a 'dad' move!" Xion screamed.

Roxas quickly opened a dark corridor and the two ran through it. The corridor closed, causing for Saïx to slam into a wall. "Ow…" he said and passed out.

* * *

><p><em>In Luxord's room…<em>

Xion and Roxas made it to what they called "Sanctuary" which was Luxord's room. The two saw Luxord looking at his mail and Xion saw that he threw away an offer from Netflix.

"Um, Luxord, you don't want to rent movies from Netflix?" she asked.

"Nope. It's a scam," Luxord said.

"What?" Roxas said while Xion burst into a fit of laughter.

"It's a scam. Don't rent from them," Luxord said.

"What? What does that mean?" Xion asked.

"I'm not falling for that. It's just like the Billy Madoff scandal," Luxord said.

"But, you're just renting a movie. Not giving your social security number," Roxas said.

"Not falling for it," Luxord said.

"That is such a dad move," Xion said.

"A what?" Luxord said.

"A dad move. You're acting like a neurotic dad, Luxord," Roxas said.

The three immediately heard roaring and knew it was Saïx. "Run guys," Roxas said.

The three disappeared in dark corridors and headed for Traverse Town. Saïx, who was angry again at losing to someone on Angry Birds. Unknowingly to him, he was getting his butt kicked at the game by his Superior…

* * *

><p><em>So, that's what happens when Xion and Roxas notice the Organization's "Dad Moments". Review please.<em>

_-miano53_


End file.
